Welcome to last Saturday, March 5.
There probably was kissing on TV
and I didn't get to wear my favorite pajamas either,
and by the end of this day,
moving to Australia and leaving it all behind
didn't seem like a bad idea.
1. 8:30 AM--We were supposed to be leaving out the door for our boys' first swimming lesson. But we weren't. We're still home, Despite the fact that we'd been up for 2 hours and everything was ready the night before...why were we late, people! Does this bug any other mothers out there? So in a mad rush to get there in time, Mom's mood made a drill sergeant look like a pansy.
2. 9:00 AM--Swimming Lessons started, and we aren't there. Nope. We are sitting in a busy intersection, right off the exit, out of gas. Blocking Traffic. Here come the tears. And the self pity of no matter how I try, I can't do anything right. Moms: WHY do we do this to ourselves?
The Silver Lining:
Our friends had signed up for the same class, so they weren't too far away. Thankfully, they came to our rescue: got our kids to class and lent us their van. See, it's not so bad.
3. 9:20 AM--I take Steve's credit card and my friend's van and head to the nearest gas station. My tears have dried, my mood has calmed, I think we might just make it through the day. Then, standing in line to buy my yet another gas can to join the 4 others sitting in the garage, I am greeted by the attendant with: "We don't take credit cards." WHAT? Who doesn't take credit cards? All of a sudden, I look and feel pathetic. We just ran out of gas, my husband and baby are stranded in the car on the side of the highway, and you are refusing to help me. I didn't say that, but I felt it. The tears started welling up as I turned to put the can away. Until, enter Weslie:
The Silver Lining:
"How much do you need?" She asked. A stranger, from the line of people 7-deep. Embarrassed, I told her the cost of the gas can, and that I'd need gas to put in it to start our car. She offered to pay for it. Wow. I'd never had a stranger help me like that before. Somehow, "Thank You" still didn't seem like enough. The only way to repay a favor like that is to pay it forward and serve someone else in need. Now the gas can stays in my car as a reminder...and in case I need it again.
So now, if you run out of gas, you know you can call me, because I have a gas can in my car, after all.
9:40 AM--I get the gas to Steve, who puts the gas in the car -- and on his hands, the street, the car --it was a lame gas can. BUT, at least we got gas, and we can get on our way to pick up our kids from swimming, which has been over for 10 minutes by now. I told him how to get to swimming and meet me there. I'm about to leave when:
4. 9:45 AM--Our van won't start. Despite Weslie's goodness, our problems were not solved. This opened up more tears. Battery's dead. Awesome. We may have exchanged some "I told you so"s at this point, and my mood was atrocious (didn't have to look up the spelling on that one).
The Silver Lining:
I had not yet left with my friend's van, so we precariously pulled it aside and jumped our van. It worked.
Now you also know that if your battery's dead, you can call me, too. Now, can we please be on our way?
5. 10:00 AM--We arrive FINALLY at swim lessons. The boys had a good time. Our friends were angelic. And Steve was forgiving. We might make it a good day after all. But then, in the car I lost something important I JUST HAD. Does this happen to you? I beat myself up about it the whole drive, convinced I'd dropped it during the whole gas fiasco.
The Silver Lining:
I found it an hour later when I got out of the car.
6. 12:00 PM--We took a mini-road trip up north to the Temple and my parent's house with these save-the-day friends. Unfortunately, we got there with some bad timing and didn't get to do all the work we had hoped to do.
The Silver Lining: The Temple is an extremely peaceful place, and this time with the way my day was going, I noticed it especially.
7. 1-4 PM--I was just a stressed out mess. My kids were cranky. I was cranky. My friends' kids were being angelic, and we were just the opposite. Embarrassed. Ashamed. I was convinced that I was the worst mother ever.
The Silver Lining:
I suppose we all have days like that, so our friends have turned out to be quite gracious and forgiving.
7:00 PM--I was a featured speaker in Stake Conference, an adult meeting we have at church just twice a year. Some might have numbered this as a bad thing, but I LOVED it! For those two hours, I actually remembered that this was just another day in our story--one that adds character and life. My save-the-day friend was a speaker, too, so together, we chuckled as we looked out on the 300-400 member audience and remembered how this morning I ran out of gas...and here I was about to talk about "accentuating the positive" and "living a bloggable life." For a moment, it all seemed like water under the bridge.
The Silver Lining:
none needed, because this was the best 2 hours of my day.
8. 9 PM--Our Babysitter called us 5 times, but Steve's phone was on silent. Way to go responsible parents. 2 Kids had woken up sick.
9. 10:30 PM--Getting ready for bed, I discovered that somehow my finger was totally totally totally swollen and I could not for the life of me get my wedding ring off. We tried everything but it was permanently stuck. We both knew that if it didn't get better in the morning, we'd have to get it cut off. I didn't sleep all night. There were lots of tears.
The Silver Lining:
The swelling has gone down, and when we took the "crises out of the situation" (good advice, Dad), I calmed down enough to realize that I wasn't going to cut my finger off to save my wedding ring.
I still can't get it off, so I am now that woman who wears her ring all the time. To bed, to shower, to the beach, to make bread dough. And I guess that's alright for me. Because the ring is like marriage. It goes with us in the good times and bad, sticks with us when we deserve it or not. And at the end of these terrible, horrible, no good, very bad days, that marriage is still there holding your hand and helping you wipe away tears. Telling you you're not the worst mom ever. Reminding you that this is just a stage of life we're in and our kids will grow up. And reassuring you that if you saw yourself as he saw you, you' might, in fact, love yourself. Marriage is forgiving and patient.
And for that, I'll keep my ring on forever.